My eleven o’clock consultation appointment today was with Marco P. Capellini, who usually lobbies for the National Restaurant Association. Today, however, he was on family business and paying out of his own pocket – or at least offering to do so. “No, no,” I insisted, “please – this one’s on me. Consider it pro bono.”… Continue reading Iowa, Pizza Ranch and the GOP – What Would Jesus Order?
Category: Politics and Law
North Koreans to Continue Wearing Clothes Until Further Notice
“Mr. Collins?” Gretchen softly spoke, poking her blonde head in between the oak doors leading to my office. “Did you drop off some dry cleaning down the street and forget to tell me about it?” “No,” I replied, “my latest load went to that place on Georgetown Pike in Great Falls.” “Okay,” she shrugged, “I… Continue reading North Koreans to Continue Wearing Clothes Until Further Notice
Spy vs Spy vs CIA Drone vs Iran
Across the street from the Verizon Center here in Washington DC is the national headquarters of the AARP. In the basement of that building is a large, well-lighted parking garage with atypically high ceilings. Unquestionably, if you’re going to have a clandestine rendezvous in a parking garage, it’s a very good choice. Thus, I was there… Continue reading Spy vs Spy vs CIA Drone vs Iran
Donald Trump to Showcase Republican Master Debaters
Bright and early this morning, I engaged in my second telephone consultation with Donald Trump, which his personal assistant booked for him on Monday via a call to my personal assistant, Gretchen. “What the hell,” she asked me shortly after informing me of the appointment, “do you suppose he wants now?” “My guess,” I ventured,… Continue reading Donald Trump to Showcase Republican Master Debaters
Solution to Rampant Indian Corruption Imminent
My first consultation after lunch this afternoon was with Dr. Chutiachod Haramijhaatrandkimoot Gaandukuthri of the Indian Embassy. I immediately concluded that, he, too, had recently finished lunch himself, which, if the odor of his breath was any indication, consisted of something made with stale lentils, sour mangos, over-ripe kudampuli, moldy ratin jot and putrid charoli… Continue reading Solution to Rampant Indian Corruption Imminent