19 Buenos Tipos Con Armas Pero Sin Cojones

It’s Memorial Day weekend 2022, and since New Year’s Day, the United States of America has averaged three mass shootings every two days. Cerise’s latest issue of The New Yorker, which arrived in her mail yesterday, opened the Talk of the Town with a Comment entitled “Gun Country.” It concerned a massacre committed by one… Continue reading 19 Buenos Tipos Con Armas Pero Sin Cojones

Will Article II Spank Ted Cruz?

As soon as Gretchen and I arrived at the office on Monday, she began receiving requests for a telephone consultation. “It’s some woman claiming to represent the Ted Cruz presidential campaign,” Gretchen explained, “who says her name is Ellen White.” “Would that by any chance be Ellen Gould White?” I asked. “Let me check,” Gretchen… Continue reading Will Article II Spank Ted Cruz?

Besieged Sanctuary Cities Contemplate Loss of Federal Manna

First thing this morning, I was visited by Mohammed Lumumba al-Kessommak, a strapping young black Muslim socialist who serves as a public policy adviser to the Association of American Liberal Democratic Mayors. He took the chair placed immediately in front of my desk with an air of grim determination and self-righteous umbrage. “Mr. Collins,” he… Continue reading Besieged Sanctuary Cities Contemplate Loss of Federal Manna

Boehner Resigns; Republicans Form Circular Firing Squad

After the Union Army of the Cumberland was routed by the redoubtable Confederate General Braxton Bragg at the Battle of Chickamauga, President Abraham Lincoln noted that its commander, General William S. Rosecrans, was “confused and stunned like a duck hit on the head.” I never fully understood what Lincoln was talking about until this morning,… Continue reading Boehner Resigns; Republicans Form Circular Firing Squad

Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire – The Ted Cruz vs. Mitch McConnell Cage Match

Prior to taking in The Book of Mormon Sunday evening at the Kennedy Center, Cerise and I enjoyed an early dinner at the Willard Hotel, followed by cocktails at the Round Robin Bar. There we witnessed Bodine and Garcia, Senate staffers for Majority Leader Mitch McConnell and freshman senator Ted Cruz, respectively, engaged in a… Continue reading Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire – The Ted Cruz vs. Mitch McConnell Cage Match