My eleven o’clock consultation on Friday morning was with Vice President Joe Biden. He’s a very busy fellow, of course, and it’s hardly practical for him to visit my office, what with the Secret Service detail and all of the security issues involved. So he called, naturally. Biden: Hello, Tom? Tom: Good morning, Mr. Vice… Continue reading Captain America in the Turkey Coup – A Confederacy of Gobblers
Tag: conspiracy
Western Loons Invade Oregon Bird Sanctuary
Like most other federal facilities that aren’t directly concerned with law enforcement or national defense, the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge, a vast tract of land near the town of Burns in eastern Oregon, was closed on Saturday, January 2, 2016 in observance of the New Year holiday weekend. There’s an administration center there, consisting of… Continue reading Western Loons Invade Oregon Bird Sanctuary
FIFA Fie Fo Fum! An Evil Giant Bumbles, Stumbles and Falls
Early this afternoon, Merdoso Donnato Pompino, representing the Fédération Internationale de Football Association, paid me a visit for a consultation. Obviously still on Naples time, he arrived twenty minutes late, and obviously a completely self-absorbed, if obviously aging jock, he nevertheless spent another ten trying to get Gretchen’s telephone number. What the hell, as far… Continue reading FIFA Fie Fo Fum! An Evil Giant Bumbles, Stumbles and Falls
The Eyes of Texas Are Upon Operation Jade Helm
Usually, Austin Houston Crockett Bowie Bonham III stops by for a consultation whenever he’s here in Washington DC, but Friday afternoon, I got a telephone call from him instead. Gretchen’s voice had a distinct air of relief in it as she announced Austin’s call over the intercom, since he groped her pretty heavily during his… Continue reading The Eyes of Texas Are Upon Operation Jade Helm
Ain’t Misbehaving – GOP Caught in a Twitstorm
Yesterday morning at nine, I was visited by Harold Scheisskopf, Political Strategy Coordinator with the National Republican Congressional Committee. He projected his usual veneer of smug, supercilious Skull and Bones pretension, but beneath it, I readily detected a current of distinct unease. “Nice [expletive]-kicking we gave the Democrats, huh?” Scheisskopf opened as he assumed the… Continue reading Ain’t Misbehaving – GOP Caught in a Twitstorm